Let's Go Dutch!

Apparently this whole thing is not going to be as easy as I had once imagined. I saw it going kind of like this: arrive in the Netherlands, fill out some forms, wait a bit, get a phone and a bank account and a dresser in the meantime, get my permit approved, apply for jobs, etc. It seemed fairly simple to me.

But nooooo. God forbid anything just go smoothly. It's not as if moving to another country is difficult in and of itself or anything. Why not make it a little more painful? Why not make everything confusing? Why not have different requirements for absolutely everything? And to top it off, let's not tell anyone what order to do anything in.

For starters, I have to apply for this residence permit. Marc had to give all of this crazy financial info to prove that he could support me and any damages I may incur from the state (whatever those may be). We had to sign a form stating that we are an exclusive couple cohabiting the same address, and we are now obligated to tell the government if we ever break up. Weird. I mean, forget calling friends and family--just go straight for the big shots hen shit goes down at home!

Anyhow, back to the residence permit...We mailed it in and are awaiting a call for an appointment time. No, we cannot just make an appointment. That would make far too much sense. Instead, we wait. The problem is, I need proof of address to get a phone, and I need some SOFI number (huh?) to get a bank account. This all comes after receiving a residence permit. Even better is that I think I need health insurance to gain residency, but I need a SOFI number for that as well. Did nobody double check the logistics of this process before implementing it?

Oh! This takes the cake! This whole thing--as far as I can tell--will cost over 800 Euros!! Yes, friends, that is $1,000 of my broke butt's savings right there. I am all but thrilled.

Needless to say, I spent a few minutes in tears so far. Frustration does not even begin to describe it.

On another happy note, I found out that people here get paid significantly less than people in the US. This concept never truly made sense to me. If people make less, how come housing costs the same? I mean, a condo here is still over 300,000 Euros, and a house (mind you, the definition of house is significantly different, since they live on floors of houses, not the entire thing) is over 700 thousand. That is for a floor of a house! No back yard, no front porch, no spacious living arrangements...a floor or two of a four-story house that is approximately two feet wide and 300 feet deep. Crazy Dutch homes. (Apparently they were built so skinny and tall and deep in order to save money...stingey Dutch...Thus the phrase "Let's go Dutch.")

I also can't help but wonder who shops at Gucci and Bulgari. If everyone makes lower salaries, and if everything is even more expensive here than in the States, then who could ever afford to shop at these places? Are they just there for decoration? Or possibly for tourists? I just don't know. All I can say for sure is that my hopes of ever owning designer handbags have dropped significantly in the last 24 hours. Unless, of course, I just stop eating. Then, if I save an entire year's salary, I may be able to buy a Louis baguette. Woo hoo.

What's a girl to do? They don't even have Target over here! The least they could do is give me some options to work with. Gap, Nordstrom, something! H&M just isn't fitting the First Lady look. I guess there's always Zara, what I see as a trendy mom store. Well, I guess if the shoe fits...